Bella visiting Marist last year 🙂 … Just recently, I was talking to my dad about how much I was loving it at Marist. He started laughing because he then reminded me of how two years ago, I called him on the phone telling him that I wanted to leave/transfer schools. Now of course, I’m a junior here so we know that didn’t happen haha but do you know what he told me back then?? He said, “You should stay. It’s going to get better, you just don’t know it yet. This is just going to test you.”

Two years ago, I wanted to give in and all because of what? Some tough classes and mean freshman girls? I was probably on the phone with my dad thinking, what the hell?? I’m going through a shitty time and you want me to STAY???…somewhere along those lines. Even though I didn’t understand it at the time, my dad knew what he was doing. Only now do I appreciate what he said to me then.

What if I did go home two years ago? What if I didn’t finish my semester? What if I decided to transfer right then and there? I knew too that I overcame so much in the past already, but I guess when something is pretty fresh, it feels like the end of the world. So maybe I wouldn’t have actually transferred schools or anything, but it seemed like a real possibility for me at the time. I’m just glad both my parents pushed me to face those struggles myself.

Don’t worry, I’m not gonna go through every hardship I’ve ever had in my life lol. But what I learned from challenge after challenge, FA-related or not, is that it really does test you. Sometimes we’re not always placed in the best situations, and we won’t understand it initially, but we will. We’re all gonna take our own distinct tests and yes, yours might be more difficult than someone else’s (I know, unfair), but whatever we went through/are going through in life, it’s all for a reason. Cheesy but true.

Living with FA is the biggest test of my life. It’s easy to curl up in a ball, ignore the world, and feel sorry for yourself. But that’s not the route I chose to take, it’s just not who I am. I have FA but I choose to live my life just as everyone else- I choose happiness, I choose to go away to college, I choose the people I associate myself with, I choose to treat people kindly, I choose to advocate… If it wasn’t for FA, I definitely don’t think I would have been the same person I am today so in a weird way I guess I’m pretty thankful for all it has given me. And not to say that I won’t come across more struggles in the future because I will, only now I feel stronger and better about facing them.

Ultimately, life is always going to test you!! And no, you can’t study for it; we just never know when they’re coming. I won’t give you my whole spiel of wisdom (because what would be the point of me blogging right?!) but just know that these challenges are meant to test us, not break us.