For hours, I sat at my desk contemplating what to write about first because I have so much I want to write about. Should I start with how I felt about FA initially? What was it like to stop dancing? Or the first time I experienced social anxiety? I think why I had such a tough time to decide was because it’s important to me to make a good first impression. A good first impression would mean people continuing to read my experiences, and the more people read, the more I can contribute. This first post centers around my epiphany for creating a blog, and the events that lead up to it, well, because why? It’s such a simple question but more than just a one sentence answer.

Let’s hit the rewind button, back to my teenage years, which honestly is not too long ago (I’m 20). Back to when I was 12 and did not completely understand why I was walking the way I was, or when I was 14 and noticed some kids laughing under their breath after I tripped in class, or when I was 16 and had a breakdown the night before I started using my wheelchair for the first time at school. In all of these moments, I wish I had someone who understood me— who understood what I was going through. Of course my family and friends were there to support me, but they couldn’t relate to those same experiences. Fortunately, right before I turned 16, I connected with a few other people my age from the FA community (who I still talk to some of them today). They didn’t know it back then, but they really helped make my transition to a wheelchair easier. If I can make an impact on someone who struggles with their own obstacles in some way, like they helped me, I would be ecstatic. Whether having FA or not, or even a disability or not, I would hope I can be that person who provides them comfort within their own journeys.

Truth is, I haven’t always been so happy or confident like I am now so I definitely also have a lot to say about recent years, where I have emotionally become the better version of myself since high school. Although my journey includes a great amount of FA stuff, my blog is not a representation of that; it is much more.

Blogging in high school would have been so unlike me because, let’s just put it this way, I was so not ready to share my story at that time. I repeatedly doubted that people wouldn’t listen, or that I couldn’t make a difference with what I had to offer. Yet, today I have a state of mind where I know I can make that difference. I also did not enjoy writing nearly as much as I do now. I think it’s true when they say “you find yourself” in college because throughout these past years, I grew more and more closer to writing, academically and as a leisure activity; I even minor in it now.

I thought it was the perfect time to write a blog this past summer, but never went through with it. Fast forward to this semester of junior year, and the thought of a blog never left my mind. I even started telling some of my friends about my idea, and got so much support and positive reactions from it. And so, I knew what I had to do this coming winter.

This first blog post is only the beginning, there’s more to come!